Kesha Martin, MA, LPC, NCC, DCC

MANIPULATION STATION: PART TWO-FLEAS When you have been in a toxic situation and have endured emotional abuse, self-doubt can be a very big obstacle. One that I believed I managed to conquer for the most part...but every once in awhile it rears it's ugly head. I was reflecting on my past post, Manipulation Station, and old memories of many heartbreaking experiences began to surface. It started slowly at first and before I knew it I had begun on a dark descent into the shadows of residual toxic grime and I was re-living interactions and began questioning my choices. In crept feelings of guilt, shame anger...ugh. NOT THIS AGAIN! I began battling myself and fighting urges to explain myself to a person I decided to cut out of my life. Logically, I know talking to this person will not fix anything. In fact it would most likely do quite the opposite and open Pandora's Box. I'd be hopping back on that crazy train after bravely jumping off. We had a great connection and a lo

I Don't Want to Be Angry!!!!:Understanding Your Anger and Ways to Practice Letting It Go We've all encountered that one person that you feel has really wronged you to the depths of your soul and back again. That someone who you adored and loved to the best of your ability that just kept throwing daggers your way. You know that someone who's brought out the worst in you; to the point where you start throwing daggers back and you no longer like what you have become. The toxic person, the manipulator, the liar, the fake, the shallow, the all about them friend or partner. So now here you are and you've reached the point of no return. They did or said something that put them beyond the point of redemption in your eyes and you have no desire to reconcile. You might feel there's nothing you can do or say to make things right. The thought of confrontation makes you sick because you believe it will only make things worse; you've tried before. You've come the rea

Manipulation Station Realizing you've been manipulated or are currently being manipulated by someone you love is frustrating to say the least. Sometimes it takes knowing these people and having them in our lives to show us what we don't want to become, what we are capable of becoming and who we really are.  Manipulators knowingly and often times unknowingly provoke others to behave in ways they would not normally behave. It offers them some sense of control and satisfaction to get you to the point of acting uncharacteristically; so they aren't the bad guy. At times they might even say, "You are making me look like the bad guy"..implying that you are the problem. If you are like me you'll try to see past their issues and love them anyway. If you don't see through their tactics or ignore them, it will inevitably take a toll on you and often times drive you to the point of questioning who you are. Constant criticism and fault finding for not meeting r